This front part of the video really brought back UNHAPPY memories, the memories of how those ppl were such hypocrites, all acting onli, ALL FUCKIN FAKES!!, the events in the video which i participated in many years ago, when i was being bullied by them, everything...........
the whole thing came about in dec 2002, during the time when 007's Die another day first released. Actually when i watched tat movie, it oso somehow reminded me of tat period. hmmmm
During tat time, i was absent from the retreat, which i told them tat i would be searching for work after the long o levels hols.. and tat i wun be able to attend the retreat, frankly, all the retreats i attended were all the same thing, i felt tat my presence was redundant, and tat i was being made fun of, and a lot of ugly events.
So, i din attend the retreat, and on the week's sunday meeting, which was held as usual, the leaders asked me to stay back after meeting while the rest of the servers were dismissed. Following tat, they rounded me up, made me to sit in the middle of the room, while the many many of them surrounded me. even my grp leader also participated with them and rounded me up.. during tat time i felt betrayed, BACKSTABBED!! my FUCKING GROUP LEADER ACTUALLY PARTICIPATED WITH THEM AND ROUNDED ME UP..!! ISNT HE SUPPOSED TO HELP ME...!! And they were like everytime say we are brothers-in-Christ, and they still can behave like this.... DISAPPOINTING....
WTF... all these ppl are juz going for power.. all wanna be leader.. fuck them all. this is CHURCH! how can these things happen inside a church.. and not to mention some of these ppl were of my age, even join the society later than me, in other words im their senior, and juz because they carry the more senior leader's BALLS, they are able to climb up the ladder to power. WAT A BUNCH OF FUCKERS AND HYPOCRITES!!
ok, during the time when i was rounded up, they asked me a lot of questions why i din attend the retreat, which i already told them, and some other things, which i forgot, however, one leader wanted to sack my from the society, dun wanna see me anymore, ask me to GET OUT!! during tat time i din noe wat to do, i pleaded with them to let me cont serving God as an altar server, but they juz wun relent, even after i cried and the relentless pleas..
In the end, i could onli get out, as they wanted, and NEVER EVER return.. that hurt still lasted untill this day, 6 yrs on!
I left Church, in other words, a lapse catholic for 5 years, tried many times to return but still would lapse again somehow. It was onli last year, Christmas 2007, that i was able to stick to church, until now, 2008. 1 Year on. Thank God I could stick until now, in a diff church, in a diff environment. However looking at the servers in other churches reminds me of my time as an altar servers, there were times in which i missed serviing God on the altar....
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